Apartment (from May 25)

One of my big stressors has been my old apartment. I haven’t been able to find anyone to take over my lease. It makes no sense to me, it’s such a great deal! The lease is through August 31, and since all the fees have already been paid (by me), there are no move in fees! And if someone decides they hate it, they can leave in 3 months! But no matter what I try, I can’t get someone to take it over. I’ve had like 6 people act like they wanted it, then flake out. My only good lead right now is with a couple who need a place just for the summer, but they are coming from South Carolina and don’t want to make a decision until June 4th. I don’t like that, cause that means I have to pay rent and hope they take it. But I’m running out of options! This dilemma is stressful because I don’t know if I’ll be getting new income any time soon, and I need to make what I’ve got last. Someone, anyone, want it? Even the pet deposit is paid! You can keep my stupid money for yourself if you want when you leave! Just get this off my back and my mind so I can sleep better at night.

I keep having these strange dreams about my job. I tend to dream that I’m going back to work, even though I’m not getting paid, because otherwise, my work won’t get done. I also have been having dreams about all the work I have to do on my new house. My parents came up this past weekend along with Bill and helped me do yard work. It’s so emotionally overwhelming. I feel like it’s actually messier now than it was. This whole situation is starting to get to me more. But in the evenings, I can sit out on my porch, even though it’s covered in empty boxes, and relax with a lemonade (sometimes with a splash of something extra). I do love that this is my place alone, and I can do anything I want.